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ChoppedCon Kansas City {Thoughts on Being Inclusive}

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Chopped Conference Kansas City - The Lemon Bowl

Last month I traveled to Kansas City to attend Chopped Conference, an intimate blogging conference organized by the wildly talented and incredible Marly. With just 75 or so attendees, all of the sessions took place in one room at the totally modern and completely urban River Market Event Place.

Chopped Con Collage - The Lemon BowlI’ve attended my fair share of conferences over the years but hands down, this one blew them all out of the water on every level. In just one day, I gained so many practical tips, tools and specific strategies that have already improved my blog and my business.

Silly MoniqueOn a personal level, I was able to spend precious face time with fellow bloggers who I now consider to be some of my closest friends.

Liz and Bev - The Lemon BowlBev and the countless other women who attended inspire me to be better bloggers for so many reasons and on so many levels.

Ali and Liz - The Lemon BowlFor example, Ali always inspires me to be a better food photographer. Admittedly, I don’t love the photography aspect of food blogging but it’s important for my photographs to be as high quality as my recipes which is why I continue to invest the time and energy improving my craft. If you’re a food blogger, you absolutely must check out Ali’s photography resources.

Cheryl Liz and Kristen - The Lemon Bowl

I also had the pleasure of spending time with these two beauties: Cheryl and Kristen. These ladies are constantly giving back to the blogging community by sharing advice and tips they’ve learned along their 7+ year journeys in the blogging world. They inspire me to pay it forward with the next generation of bloggers.

Foliage from Plane - The Lemon BowlSpeaking of paying it forward, whenever I attend conferences or any social gathering I try to be as inclusive as possible. As we enter the busy entertaining season, I challenge you to open your wings to someone who may need a little nudge of encouragement. If you see someone standing by themselves at a gathering, go over and introduce yourself. Welcome someone new into your circle or invite someone new over for dinner.

Lauren and Liz - The Lemon BowlBelieve me, I get it. I could have easily spent the entire conference talking to a handful of my closest friends like my girl Lauren. But the truth is, something magical happens when you expand your horizons and leave your little comfort nest. You open yourself up to new possibilities, endless discoveries and countless opportunities.

Chicago Skyline - The Lemon BowlEven more importantly, you make someone else feel more comfortable in their own skin. You put someone else at ease. You help someone else feel valued. It’s amazing how a genuine smile and a simple hello can boost someones mood in a matter of seconds.

Have you ever experienced exclusivity at a conference or social gathering? How did you overcome it or help someone else feel included? I would love to hear from you.

Disclosure: A huge thank you to my dear friends at Bob’s Red Mill who sponsored my trip to Chopped Con. I am so lucky to work with brands who invest in my growth. 

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Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. Thanks so much for kindly saying “hi” to me. I certainly was nervous and incredibly overwhelmed thinking about attending this conference. Everyone I talked to was so sweet. Even though I have been in the arena for seven years, I am not a big player in the game.

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  4. I see you and Sandy of Reluctant Entertainer as the ultimate ambassadors of gathering people around you. In the fact that you are outgoing and welcoming makes you a magnet to others. I love everything about this post, a great share for everyone in any social situation.

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  6. Oh my goodness Liz, I have been following The Lemon Bowl for a while, and I only just realized we are neighbors! I love in GR too :) Love your thoughts on being inclusive, you have inspired me to be brave and look into some attending a blogging conference soon :)

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    • So great to meet a local Grand Rapidian!!! And so cool that you’re a Brit! I lived in London in 2001 and miss it so much – my husband is desperate for us to go back one day. You should join the West Michigan Bloggers group! Shoot me an email if you’d like to learn more liz@thelemonbowl.com :)

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  7. Liz you totally nailed it with this post. In my four and a half years of blogging, I’ve never been to a blogging conference, largely because of the “exclusiveness” I feel I would encounter. I also tend to be an introvert in large groups, so the idea of a huge conference is quite overwhelming. Knowing that people like you will be at these conferences, however, makes them much more appealing! We need more people like you in this world!

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  8. Thank you so much for this post! I’m a new blogger and would love to attend a conference one day for learning and networking. It’s good to know that there are smaller, more intimate events out there. My deep fear is getting boxed out by all the bloggers who already know one another, but knowing there are inclusive people out there like you makes me feel so much better! Hope to see you at a conference some day!

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  9. I have been to a few conferences where people just talk with their friends and it is very hard to try and introduce yourself when a bunch of friends are chatting together. Sometimes I try but other times it is not worth the effort and I just walk away and find someone else to talk to.

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  11. Love this! I just launched my new blog, Life is but a Dish, and I have been researching conferences. Many of them do seem very overwhelming to me, so I’m glad to hear that there are ones that create a positive environment! I hope to cross paths with you one day in the blogging world! Love your site :)

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  12. Thank you SO much for sharing your thoughts about conferences with us! As a shy introvert, I’m usually the wallflower and sometimes feel excluded from the lively conversations that always happen at conferences. (That’s what usually happens when you put a bunch of excited women together!) It actually happened quite a few times at BHF in May, and there were times where I tried to join in a circle and was physically pushed out when ladies turned their backs, but thankfully, one woman saw me and took me under her wing for the duration of the weekend. I’ll never forget that — we turned into incredibly close friends within just a few hours! — so it’s my goal to do the same thing wherever I go, whether a blogging event or just regular life. Thank you for the sweet reminder to continue doing so! :)

    P.S. I’m really curious about what you learned about tips and strategies to improve blogging as a business! Do you think you’ll do another post about that? Because I’d literally read every word 50 times!!

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    • I’m so sorry you had that experience but know you’re not alone. We all experience it and feel it on various levels. As for specific tips and strategies, I decided to focus my recap post on the topic of inclusivity but I’m sure you’ll find tons of other recap posts that will go in to the nitty gritty of what we learned in each session.

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  14. Liz this is absolutely fantastic advice. I honestly try to do this whenever I go to a conference or any blogger event because it must be hard to be around groups of people that have known each other for years when you are new to the game. Thank you for sharing this beautiful advice with so many other bloggers.

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  15. Liz, this is so great. Chopped Con was my first conference and walking in on Thursday night I was so overwhelmed. Everyone was so nice and welcoming and I loved every minute of it. Thanks for writing this post, this is such a great way of thinking!

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  16. i have only been to one big conference and I have to say there was only one large blogger that reached out and was very nice to lil old me. I will never forget that! Every big time blogger doesn’t even go to the speakers anymore they just go to their paid events so it’s kind of hard at large conferences to learn from people that are only there for a paid vacation to meet up with fellow bloggers on their level. Thank you so much for being awesome and encouraging bigger bloggers like yourself to pay it forward.

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  17. Yep, you hit the nail on the head, Liz. It’s hard being that new blogger, standing in the corner with no one to talk to. And it’s people like you that make the conference fun and engaging for that person. I am a fan of the smaller conferences and really appreciate the opportunity to chat with everyone. Great post!

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  18. I didn’t even know about this chopped conference until I saw you were going. I’ve been blogging 3 years and last May was my very first conference and it was to BlogHer Food in Miami. Talk about overwhelming and I’m an extrovert myself! I found it to be very cliquey and many people who I had thought were online blogging friends didn’t give me the time or day. The competition was fierce as well for the attention of the sponsors and being aggressive isn’t my style. My 2nd conference was in September to the Big Potluck in PA and I loved it! Everyone was warm, welcoming and truly down to earth. I think I’m all set with larger conferences and will stick with the smaller ones. Thanks for bringing this White Elephant topic up!

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  19. I love every single thing about this!!! It is so easy to stay where you are comfortable…but you never know who you might find for a friend if you are open to new people. I hope there is ChoppedCon next year…it looked amazing!

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  20. Liz, I loved reliving that weekend! With my first conference under my belt, I have you and all the other fabulous ladies to thank for that! Thank you for including me as it was terrifying coming into that weekend with never meeting most of everyone I met!

    I can’t wait until the next time we can chit chat and hopefully spend more time together!

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  21. I am SO glad I met you at Chopped! It was so sweet of you to be so inclusive…you and all the other girls I met right when I came upstairs at the hotel were so welcoming, even though I haven’t hit it “big” in the food blogging world. I thought this conference was so inclusive and amazing, perfectly demonstrated by the fact that Ali invited all of us back to her apartment for the after party. I could have never imagined that all of these women who I admire so much for their talent could be so humble, genuine, and kind to someone (me) who is clearly beneath them in the blogging world. I love this post and I absolutely LOVED meeting you…but next year we need to get a pic too girl!

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  22. Thank you for this post. As a true introvert who birthed an introvert food blogger, we are the ones that look like they are going to cry in that room full of people while hugging the wall. The more people ignore you, the more you withdraw in yourself. It’s awful. You want so much to be having fun with everyone, but the fear of people not wanting you around/liking you/etc. is so overwhelming. The larger the group, the worse it is. And what a relief it is when some kind soul comes over and asks you to go to dinner with their group, because we sure aren’t going to butt in and ask if we can go. Clearly, you touched a nerve for me. Giant nightmare is going somewhere by yourself. Actually, our church was having a soup dinner tonight as a fundraiser, but since my husband is out of town this week, I chose to stay home, since I didn’t know if anyone would be there that would be ok for me to sit with. Ugh. How we wish we could be extroverts, but it’s just not who we are. Bless you for finding us and being kind and including us. I can’t tell you how much it helps. Besides, once you break the ice with us, we really are fun and knowledgable. Just not outgoing. Thank you again and I really hope that others take this to heart.

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    • Wow thank you so much for your thoughtful, honest comment Julie. Admittedly, I’m not introverted by nature but please know that extroverts share their own sets of issues and idiosyncrasies. For example, I often worry about being too loud, overly excited and too talkative person when I’m surrounded by quiet and professional introverts. :) There are pros and cons to every type of personality but the bottom line is that life is more exiting with all types of people. I think it’s important for all of us to use our personality strengths to help others – whether that means extending a dinner invitation or offering an open ear. Thank you again for reading – it really means a lot.

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    • It seriously pains me that you were not there. I mean seriously, how many conferences take place in the midwest?? Next time I’m packing you in my suitcase. I’ll throw a few energy balls in so you don’t starve.

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  24. You hit the nail on the head, lady! That conference was amazing. With all of the drama, competition, and bullshit going on in blogging lately (and in FBHEO, let’s be honest), I almost didn’t go to the conference. I’m so glad I did! It was the biggest group of supportive, helpful bloggers ever. No competition, just love and respect. Wow. I really needed that. I didn’t know it still existed.
    Plus, I’m so glad I went so I could finally meet youuuu. Erin told you me you were tops, and I definitely believe her :)
    xoxox
    Christina

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  26. I think that some of what comes across as cliquey is rooted in people gravitating toward what is familiar and comfortable in an otherwise new or uncomfortable situation. As a closet introvert, I’d like nothing more than to stick close to my friends in those situations, so I try to push myself out of my comfort zone to try to bring others in. You do such a wonderful job welcoming people simply by radiating the warmth that is you.

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    • You are absolutely right. I know that so many people don’t exclude others intentionally or even realize they’re being exclusive which is why I felt it was important to touch on the subject. Even if we just make one extra effort to say hello or smile at someone we don’t know, it can help us all. PS: I miss you :) xoxo

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  27. Liz, this is such a great post. I have been dreaming of going to a blogging conference for a few years now (they are expensive!!!). I hope to continue to grow my blog and have these opportunities like you. And about reaching your hand out to those that look left out…I love that! I know all of these bloggers via the internet and I know many of them “know” me, but I often wonder when I get to one of these conferences will everyone ignore me? I may follow their blog daily, but I wonder if they’ve ever even seen mine? All these questions run through my head!

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    • Wow thank you so much Jennifer – that is truly heart warming to hear you say!! I am honestly blown away. Thank you so, so much. I look forward to seeing your continued success as well!

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  29. I have thoroughly loved speaking and attending blog conferences over the last few years. I always learn a ton and come away feeling inspired, but yes just this weekend I was having a conversation about how some of them feel very…unwelcoming because people won’t open their circles. Ahh and you made me miss KC

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    • It’s so true, Amanda. I wish it wasn’t the case but I’ve been hearing the same more and more lately which is why I felt inspired to share my thoughts. I hope our paths cross one day soon!!

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  30. as an introvert that sells handcrafted items at art fairs this is something that makes me uncomfortable on a regular basis. Artist breakfasts, the occasional dinner… I’d rather be hiding in my booth “setting up”. But going to those events changes the show for me when I can connect with another artist or get suggestions about other shows. Its something that always makes me anxious but most times I just suck it up and it turns out fine. Thanks for being aware of those of us that don’t find those events easy…

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    • I’m so glad you shared your thoughts. I’ve totally been there at big trade shows doing the same thing “setting up” in my booth! But you’re right, we always gain so much more when we go outside of our comfort zones.

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  31. Hi Liz! My husband and I ar both very active at our American Legion Post and attend many meetings throughout the state. I have always found a smile and hello to be a wonderful way to meet new people and it’s something I do wherever we go. It amazes me every time when someone seems a little hesitant, just smiling and saying hi can mean you have just made a new friend!!!

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  32. No one could have said it better! I want everyone to read this post, bloggers and non bloggers alike. We need to step out of your comfort zones, out of our “me me me” attitudes and take a step toward encouraging others. What most people don’t realize is that when you take that step you are the one that benefits the most, listening instead of making sure you’re being heard. You are the best at all of these things my friend. So wish I could have joined you! Thanks for sharing your insights!

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  35. Going to a conference alone is so out of my comfort zone. My worry each time is that I’ll have no one to talk to because I think everyone else knows one another – which is always untrue. I hope to make it to the next Chopped Con, it looks like you had a wonderful time!

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  36. What a wonderful experience! I agree on preferring the smaller, more intimate conferences–the larger ones are a bit overwhelming for me and it’s so easy to get lost in the sea of people, especially if you don’t know many people there. I attended my first large conference this year and I won’t do it again–it was incredibly cliquey and while I found a wonderful core group of people to hang with, I also missed being able to get to know everyone like you do at smaller conferences. You are wonderful, you know that?

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    • Yes I completely get it. Even an extrovert like myself can find large conferences overwhelming because you want to talk to ALLOFTHEPEOPLE but simply can’t. Anyway, thank you so much for reading and for your sweet words. It really means a lot.

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  39. Sounds like you had a great time. I’ve never been to Kansas City but it’s a place I’d like to visit! I couldn’t agree more about being inclusive. Blogging especially can be so clicking. Thanks for the reminder! I always tell my boys to be kinder than necessary- it will change someones day! xo

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  40. This post makes me love you even more, Liz! As a new-ish food blogger, I feel like I will really benefit from a conference. There is that fear in the back of my mind…what if nobody talks to me?! It seems like there are so many awesome bloggers that have already-established relationships with each other. I feel like I would be the odd one out. :-/

    ChoppedCon looks very cool too. I will add it to my list of possibilities for next year (or two?), perhaps. And how cool to get to go with the support of a sponsor!? That is another challenge for me personally right now – coming up with the resources to invest in development. Keep up the great work!

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  43. What a wonderful post, Liz! I’m so glad you wrote about this topic of inclusivity. It was a big goal when planning the conference, probably because I’ve been to too many conferences where exclusivity ruled the day. And I’ve talked to other bloggers who talked about spending precious money to go to a conference only to sit in their hotel rooms and cry. isn’t that awful to think about? Anyway, I love that we all came together, met some amazing people (like you!!) and learned together. Big hugs to you!

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    • That is absolutely awful Marly. I can’t imagine that but yet I’m also not entirely surprised. I know that inclusivity is a hot topic among bloggers and really any large group of people, especially women. Thank you so much for raising the bar when it comes to what a conference should look and feel like!

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  45. I didn’t even know this conference was happening until it already happened! What a bummer, that is one that I would have loved to attend. I am not a huge fan of larger conferences, they are very cliquey and it makes putting yourself out there very difficult.

    I love your challenge of being inclusive, it’s something all of us should try to do more often!

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    • I completely agree. It seems the larger the conference, the more cliques there are which can be really hard for people who aren’t outgoing or are new to the group. Thanks for reading Carrie!

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  46. This is such encouraging advice Liz! I read something the other day about introverts and how when they get in social situations they will stand by the exit door because it’s too overwhelming! Totally waving my hand on that one. But it is true that when someone approaches and starts to make you feel at ease then I know for me it helps me leave the exit door and enjoy the party!

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